I'm back from a couple days of random fuckery. Well, it was mostly hanging out with friends, which did go really well, and I really enjoyed. The last day, yesterday, I went out to a cafe with a teacher I had gotten close with. We chatted about stuff for about an hour and a half, and when I got home, I couldn't really do anything. To be honest it's probably because I had accidentally missed taking a couple doses of my anti-depressant, which can really come back to bite me in the ass. But it was, a little harrowing, a little miserable. It's okay though, I'm up and I think in my right mind. All I ever really need is a little bit of hope. Today I'm hoping to do some more Crime & Punishment reading, maybe start another read-through of Annihilation. On top of that, all I'm really asking myself to do today is to do some more writing on Moral Intuition. Oh and reach out to a certain college-counselor I've been neglecting for weeks now. Oh, that and I have a clarinet lesson today.
I've been yapping about morality and stuff for a while now and at the same time that I'm frustrated because I'm sitting in my garage, overstimulated, I'm also getting kinda frustrated with trying to articulate my intentions. Maybe it has to do with the way that explaining one concept means explaining a fuck ton more logic that I've taken for granted in my head. I've gone through that one article about defining morality again and I checked out this other one on the evolutionary biology of it, but none really gave me more vocabulary to express what I wanted. I'm currently about to dive into this one about metaethics, which it describes itself as, "Metaethics is the attempt to understand the metaphysical, epistemological, semantic, and psychological, presuppositions and commitments of moral thought, talk, and practice". I feel almost a little disillusioned? As if this topic isn't really all I cracked it up in my head to be? I think mostly it's that I have the most fun when I'm in the throes of battling it out with some concept, and not when I'm trying to explain it in the most efficient of terms. Especially given that a lot of my logic and how I think things out isn't exactly verbal, and it complictes everything to try and untangle this mess of connections in my head. Maybe I should make a little map :), maybe I should write things in my own words so it makes total sense to me. And then I can go about defining the terms I use. Okay, okay. I want to try again. I'm going to read this Metaethics article because I do think it may help.
Okay update: Eh. Honestly I'm feeling very much like going and doing some research on Self-Organizing Systems or other. Kinda bored. Anyways going to do some yapping under the pretense of trying to explain it to myself using the terms that work for me, and then endeavoring to explain it later:
Moral Intuition. So. Morality, a social structure based on a duality inherent to humans: bad/good. Which anthropologically, developed as a result of cultural tradition compiling into an outline of what the society deems proper human behavior. How well you align with that construction of an ideal, mythical, and even divine picture of humanity defines how good or bad you are as a human. This is why most morality comes along with religion. Morality itself, the nature of that advice, is just the natural accumulation of life lessons that pass through generations. Just as cultural mythos and values develop throughout the life of a nation, an emotional system of morality develops in all the nations citizens. Moral intuition is the emotional manifestation of those cultural values. Morality is nebulous, I cannot claim to believe in a normative morality, simply because I cannot endorse the notion of the "moral agent", which acts in denial of neurodivergence and has and is used to oppress. On that basis, nonetheless morality is deeply emotional. Moral lessons have truth to them and find basis in genuine social-emotional conflicts and have lots of wisdom. In addition, their emotional origin has real truth and real basis, where the nature of good and bad—which are fundamental to the human experience—are exercised. Intuition itself is just the exercized version of a societal value system, nonetheless, we hold responsibility which comes along with our personal moral systems. Morality is and can be a valuable system to approach behavior. Moral intuition needs to be approached with an extreme amount of criticality. Anyways. I'm honestly getting QUITE bored. And I want to do a little thinking about Marketland... I'm going to go write in my notebook,, I'll post this for now and update you guys when I have something interesting to say... Thanks!
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